The fact that the first impression of a person is formed in the first five seconds of acquaintance, psychologists have long established. Knowing this, you can work on yourself and try to create the image that you like. In the first communication, what you say will make a big difference. The main thing is to ask the right questions to a man when meeting.

From this article you will learn:

  • Why is it so important to be tactful when asking questions to a man when meeting?
  • What questions should be avoided when meeting a man?
  • What questions will help to interest a man when communicating on the Internet or on the phone?

What questions should you ask a man when meeting?

Regardless of gender and age, at the beginning of dating people can behave stiffly and unnaturally, feeling a psychological barrier. In such a situation, women usually talk too much, and men only listen and respond sparingly to questions. Excessive talkativeness of the fair sex can scare away the gentleman. He will decide that such behavior is typical for a lady, and will not want to continue the acquaintance.

If you are afraid to get into such a situation, try to ask more of the interlocutor, asking tactful questions, rather than talking about yourself and everything that you see around.

To begin with, decide how interesting the gentleman is to you and how you imagine your relationship with him. If already on the first date you understand that you want to try to build something serious with this man, then find out his opinion about the family, children and life in general. After such questions, the gentleman may no longer appear in your destiny, and this will mean that your goals have not coincided and that he is not set up for a long-term relationship.

In order not to compromise yourself, avoid talking about: salary, the number of people registered in the apartment, social status, sexual preferences and attitude to religion. It is better to build a conversation on a discussion of hobbies, hobbies and life goals. You can talk about movies, music or art, sports or books.

If already at the initial stage you understand that you really like a man and you need to keep in touch with him at all costs, try to find common interests and hobbies and build a conversation around them.

Do not skimp on compliments if the person deserves them. Be sincere and emotional, try to charm the gentleman with your naturalness and ability to carry on a conversation.

Try to follow a few rules:

don’t be intrusive

Do not impose your communication, even if you really liked the guy. Both men and women do not like being pressured. To understand what topics you can talk about, put yourself in the place of the interlocutor.

be careful with the frequency

Stop talking without interruption, do not bombard a man with questions that he does not have time to answer. Try to build an equivalent dialogue.


Interrupting is tactless, no matter who you’re talking to. Ask the next question only after you have received an answer to the previous one. Listen carefully to the other person’s answers. If you feel that the topic of conversation is interesting to him, try to delve into it with additional questions.


Build any contacts with the gentleman on the basis of respect for him. If your plans have changed or there are urgent matters that make you unable to get to the meeting, do not forget to warn the man about it.


Value your time and the time of others. You should not be late, even if you just agreed to write off on a social network.


Do not force the gentleman to answer a question that he does not like. Release the situation “on the brakes”, transfer the conversation to another topic. Remember what the interlocutor did not want to talk about, and do not return to this issue again.

Showing interest

Put yourself in the place of the interlocutor. What would you like to talk about on a first date? Build a conversation around topics that are interesting to you, otherwise you will look insincere. Show that you really care about the other person’s answers to your questions.

Only in the case of mutual involvement will the conversation be rich and productive.

You should not ask too personal and intimate questions when you first meet a man. You only have a first date, you just get to know each other so far. Do not embarrass your partner, leave intimate topics for a later stage of dating.

Here are the topics on which you can build a dialogue with a man on a first date:

  • Interests;
  • Work or business and what you like about it;
  • Animals, pets;
  • Travels;
  • Movies, books, music.

Talking about these safe topics will already help you know what kind of person you are dealing with. Be tactful and delicate, do not get into the soul, do not dig too deep, do not ask if the gentleman is ready to get married and have children right now. And avoid sexual questions, they are not meant for a first date.

What question to ask a man when meeting? Here are some suitable options:

  • What kind of music do you like? What do you listen to when you’re sad or, conversely, happy?
  • What do you like more, football or hockey? How often do you watch games?
  • How often do you take a break during the week? What do you like to do on vacation?
  • What books do you like to read: detectives, business, poetry, historical, popular science?
  • How many friends do you have? How often do you meet them?
  • Do you like to play computer games and how much time do you devote to them?

Avoid closed questions that can be answered with yes or no. Give the interlocutor a chance to speak out, to tell about himself.

Don’t give a person an open interrogation. If you see that the gentleman is embarrassed, first try to answer your own questions to inspire him with your sincerity and truthfulness.

When meeting on the street, ask to take you to the right place or carry a small load. If the man agrees, ask him a few questions: what is his name, does he live in the area, does he know the city well, etc.


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