Women and men are different: by their nature, perception of the world, life goals and priorities. And although at first glance the needs of a man and a woman in relationships and love are very similar, you can probably guess that here there are cardinal differences between us. Do you want to know what?
Today I will help you get answers to questions that probably have repeatedly arisen in your head: “How to understand a man?”, “How to find out a man’s attitude towards himself?”, “How to understand a man’s behavior?”
The psychology of men’s behavior does not depend on nationality, zodiac sign or place of residence. The way of thinking may be influenced by the upbringing or mentality of the country, but the natural needs of men are the same. Just like with women: she can be a business woman, hold a leadership position, but at the same time she wants to be loved. She has a natural need to be protected, to feel safe next to a man, to be surrounded by male care.
In this article, I will tell you 5 golden truths that will help you understand a man. Having figured out how the male “mechanism” works, the psychology of relations with a man will become a little easier for you.
Read to the end and you will know:
- What is the difference between the characteristics of male and female psychology
- Is it right to treat a man the way you want him to treat you?
- Is it possible to change a man?
- Why does a man take advantage of a woman?
- The man doesn’t want a relationship. What does he mean?
- What is the importance of the feminine word
I have prepared for you a detailed and thorough video from which you will learn the whole truth about men. And you will begin to understand them a little better.
It sounds paradoxical, but men also want relationships, they want a family. I understand that some will now say: “What kind of nonsense are you talking about? I met a man and he plainly said that he did not want a serious relationship. In fact, for some reason, he simply does not want a relationship with a particular woman, but he cannot voice this reason out loud. This does not mean that all men avoid relationships.
They want relationships, they need them, they don’t feel complete without a relationship. Yes, the man is experiencing it is not so anxious. For example, there is a huge difference between the behavior and feelings of a 35-year-old woman and a 35-year-old man who are not in a relationship! This is easy to explain in terms of natural functions: a woman gives birth to children, she has this subconscious need. And the older she gets, the harder it is to do so. There are medical contraindications that can complicate the process.
It may seem to you: “Here is a man, he is 40 years old, successful, rich, he has many admirers. If he wanted a relationship, he would have gotten married long ago!” It is not a fact that if he is not in a relationship, he does not want it.
Believe me, I communicate with many men, successful and unsuccessful. And if you think that such men go “And I’m handsome, I’m cool, why do I need a relationship at all?”, You’re wrong. They also cry, worry, they just don’t show it as clearly as women.
I will give one more argument: every day in your city, country, world there are so many weddings! What is it, women marry each other? If men didn’t have relationship needs, they wouldn’t waste time, go on dates, get married, raise kids. They would simply satisfy their need for sex, would use the services of women of the appropriate profession and would not waste their time and energy on dates.
Truth #1: A man has a different way of thinking
The psychology of men in love and relationships, at first glance, has similar needs to women’s. It’s simple: men want love and women want love. Men need to feel warm in a relationship and women too. Men need support in relationships and women need it.
It seems that the needs are the same, but if we decipher these terms, we will find that men and women think in completely different ways. We perceive what love is in completely different ways, we want to receive some support when it’s bad.
A simple example: the behavior of a man when he feels bad. He prefers to distance himself from a woman, to distance himself from everyone, to withdraw into his loneliness, a kind of emotional container. He needs time to recover, to come to his senses.
What need do women feel when they feel bad? Share your problem. It is important for them to share, communicate, and talk about the problem. And the more a woman does it, the easier it becomes for her. I do not want to convince you that all men are like this or all women are like that, I want to explain to you that there are many differences.
After all, how does a woman talk? “So what do I want in a relationship? I want love, care, attention and so on. And if I want it, then I have to give it to my partner.” She tries to give it to a man, and then she wonders: “What’s wrong? I do so much for him, I give so much, but in return I get nothing or I get some crumbs.
This happens because you need to understand: if you want something from a man, then you need to think about the question of how to understand your husband/boyfriend and learn how to cover his needs. Now I will say one important thing, and you remember well: men are endowed with the same instincts, have similar needs. After birth, there is a certain layering: the influence of parents, school, religion, environment, the mentality of the country, but these are already imposed rules, layering on the primary personality of a man.
It is important to understand the needs of a partner, it is important to study them and you do not need to follow the rule “Treat the other person the way you want to be treated” 100%.
This phrase is generally true: if you want to be treated kindly, be kind. If you want a man to think positively next to you, you must also be positive. In a general context, this works, but in terms of deeper, natural needs, it is useless. The psychology of men in relationships with women is based on needs that are different from women’s. This must be remembered.
For example, for a man, respect is more important than love and romance. It is important for him to hear that he is strong, he is a winner, than “I love you”, “You are my beloved, my sweet”. I am not saying that you need to eradicate declarations of love or stop being warm and loving. It’s just that for a man, respect is really more important.
I like the phrase: “A man is more likely to live with a woman who does not love him, but respects him. Then with that woman who loves him, but does not respect. I understand that it sounds controversial and do not urge you to go to extremes. I urge you to add respect to the feeling of love for a man. Respect is taking into account, recognition of his masculine qualities. If you combine respect and love, you will better understand how to learn to understand a man.
Truth #2: Men don’t change.
If you get married or enter into a relationship with a man and at the same time give yourself the installation: “In general, I like this man. Of course, I am not satisfied with this moment and this moment, but I will change / fix / correct it, ”you live in an illusion.
You know that I study English and communicate regularly with Native Americans to improve my speaking skills. So, the desire to change a man is a misfortune not only for women in the post-Soviet space, it is the same story abroad.
Understand, please, a man does not change. If at the beginning of a relationship you see that a man is a careerist, spends little time at home – most likely, when he has a family, it will be the same. And if his way of life immediately does not suit you or causes discomfort, you are at great risk.
Or, on the contrary, a man is not purposeful, he has a moderate rhythm of life, ambitions are below average. It’s not good or bad, it’s just how it is. And if it suits you, great, but if now you think that “I’ll go through some women’s training and start inspiring him! He will become ambitious, purposeful, his income will grow 30 times” – most likely, this is an illusion.
If a man, for example, is a sissy, he will have a very close relationship with his mother, which will affect your relationship. At first it will be tolerable, then you will try to somehow change the situation, and this is very difficult.
In such cases, you need to think not about how to understand men. You need to turn to yourself. Ask yourself this question: “If this man does not change and remains the way he is at the moment, will I be happy and satisfied?” If the answer is “no”, you are at great risk by entering into a relationship with such a partner. With a probability of 98% it will not change.
If you say “Yes, this man suits me, I love him, next to him I feel like a woman” – this is a good sign. Entering into a relationship with such a man, you act wisely.
Truth #3: Men love their ears.
Men need recognition, they have a real hunger for this feeling. Look at how adults, girlfriends, behave when they meet: “Oh, you have a new hairstyle”, “And your dress is beautiful!” They just shower each other with compliments. And this is normal, you are not shy about each other.
In men, this is not accepted, this is how their mentality works. Men do not say to each other: “What a muscle you are”, “How successful you are”. And if we are talking about men in the post-Soviet space, they basically do not hear good words addressed to them.
As children, they heard only criticism and comparisons: “Petya is smarter”, “Vasya is stronger”, “You are not smart enough / beautiful / obedient”. I understand that women who grew up during this time heard the same thing from adults. If your parents treated you differently, you had a good childhood in terms of the emotional sphere. Don’t misunderstand me: I don’t want to blame anyone, to say that parents, grandparents did bad things – it was just such a time. Some people aren’t raising their kids right now.
So, most men, in principle, do not hear the words of recognition. Not in the sense: “You are beautiful”, “You are wonderful”, “You are a good person”. I’ll tell you a secret: if you want to offend a man, tell him that he is a good person. A man needs recognition of his masculinity, intelligence, personal qualities, and so on.
The psychology of men in relation to women is arranged in such a way that they just need to hear good words. Most people in a relationship only hear criticism and are unaware of the existence of compliments. They don’t know that there really are women who say nice words to their men. But the majority prefers to act through criticism, because they are afraid, they are not used to behaving differently. Because they never saw mom treat dad differently.
I don’t say: “Men are so poor, go and have pity on them.” We consider male characteristics so that the question does not arise “How can a woman understand a man?”
It is important to understand with what emotional state you say a compliment to a man. If you praise a man in order to earn love, a good attitude towards yourself, or to get something from him, it is felt. Compliments are important to speak with generosity, without expecting something in return.
It is not necessary to praise men for the sake of “deserving” love, a good attitude towards yourself, or the hope of getting something from the chosen one. A man will feel insincerity. I think that normal men only get better from good words. However, weak men can relax. But you are in control, so you can always stop saying words of recognition to a man.
Many are afraid to “spoil” a man. Normal men only get better from good words. Weak, unworthy men can relax. But you can always control the situation, so you can always stop saying words of recognition to your partner. I hope you figured out how to understand what a man wants.
Truth #4: A woman allows, a man uses
The psychology of a man in relation to a woman is built in such a way that he will take advantage of what is offered to him. Let me explain with examples:
- The man does not have an apartment. The woman brought him to her. The man took advantage of it.
- The man lost his job and the woman let him lie on the couch, get depressed, or take him into her business. The man agreed to this.
- A woman gives a man expensive gifts. The man accepts it.
- A woman allows her freedom to be limited. The man takes advantage of it. This is an example of tyranny, an abuser.
- In a difficult situation, a woman solves all problems. The man agrees to this.
- The woman considers herself the main earner. A man uses this and does not aspire to anything.
And there are many more such examples. Of course, a woman agrees to this for a reason. She agrees under the pretext of love: “We are a team. We are a family and we love each other.” It’s okay for her to take out a loan in her name or sell a kidney to buy him the latest iPhone. But of course you are not. You already know how to understand what a man needs from you.
Not all men are like that. I’m talking about the majority. A conscious man who understands life and the laws of psychology will not use this. He will say: “I don’t want to live in your apartment because it’s not very reasonable.” If you already correspond to the level of such a developed man, then they will meet you. And if you feel that men are taking advantage of you, then you should ask the question: “Why do I attract such men? What is stopping me from attracting a businessman/conscious man?”
You probably want to hear the whole list – what you can agree on and what not. But there are no templates. To understand a man’s attitude towards himself and his way of thinking, flat knowledge will not be enough. It is important to understand in 3d, even in 5d mode, why and how the psychology of men works in relationships with a woman. You need to have a developed personality in order to conduct dialogues with men at the level.
Truth #5: A woman says, a man does.
Women have a huge influence on men. Only with a word can she “kill” a man morally and emotionally. Even just a breath. The man did something wrong – you sigh. A sigh can spoil a man’s mood, and a word can lower his self-esteem.
It is necessary to understand the power of the word. For example, a man cannot make a woman happy with just words. A man can say: “You are extraordinary”, “You are beautiful”, “I will marry you”. But without action, these words mean nothing.
And a woman can make a man happy with words, reaction, recognition even without action. When a man is happy with you, he is unlikely to be seen in a relationship with his mistress. Perhaps there will be fewer men who have left the family, men who are alcoholics and womanizers. Having learned this, you will be less puzzled about how to understand it.
Only a few women know this truth and understand what women’s value is. Recently, it so happened that you do not know yourself from the side of strength. You can build a career, become a professional, survive, have a baby.
Most know about themselves only what concerns achievement, survival functions, but only a few understand what their true value as women lies in, they know about their feminine strength.
Women’s power is not about career achievement. I do not devalue your merits, but your strength is not in this. It is important not only to know your strength, but also to learn how to use it. It’s like learning a new language.